Félicie, aussi...

Hey reader! I got a package today! A cool package from my friends in France! A cool pirate book, and pirate gums (as in chewing gum, don't be gross!) and pirates mints with a rum flavour. I particularly liked the rum flavoured mints, and it reminded me of an anecdote which reminded me of a post idea I have had for a long time, so here comes... suspense...

The Top Three of Things Which You Thought Were a Good Idea But Turned Out to be Really Stupid.

1) Baking Bredalas. I think I told you about bredalas. In the definition in the Alsatian-Alsatian dictionary it expressedly states "Delicious little evil cookies which should be exclusively baked by someone else". Following that logic, I usually leave the bredala cooking to my mum, mostly, because she bakes duuuuh-licious bredalas.

A few weeks back, however, I decided to bake some in order to have a birthday present for a friend I have at the university. I went "yeah! It's going to smell like cinnamon and christmas in the kitchen, it's self-made and tasty, let's!". At the end of the day, the kitchen looked and smelled like the inside of a reindeer's stomach, I had spent three hours in the kitchen (three bloody hours! Can you believe that!? What have I done with my youth, reader?) and had an estimate 50 pounds of paper thin biscuits, which were hard as marble. And I cried and I cried...

2) Drinking rum to get over my cold just before my music oral exam for the Baccalaureat. Now look, I know this one sounds like it's so stupid I should be too ashamed to even write about it, but: I woke up, 3 hours to go before my exam, and I had a sore throat. I had to sing for my music exam, so what do you do?

A nice grog, that's what you do! Herbal tea, honey, and a dollop of rum. Only when your nose is blocked, you don't actually smell how rummy the whole thing is until you've drunk it up and blown your nose. At which point it is too late and you have to go complete your oral exam smelling like a homeless guy who randomly stumbled into the exam room. I did manage to complete the exam, and had a good mark too, and now that I come to think of it, maybe I should get drunk before my final oral at the end of the year. I'm sure the potential guy from the UNO in my jury would be sensitive to my impersonating Angela Merkel dancing the twist.

3) Now I believe this one is my all time favourite. I once heard a guy on TV say that putting a drop of dishwashing liquid on your glasses would prevent them from getting all misted up. It's annoying when your glasses get all misty. What's annoying too, is when your goggles get all misty at the swimming pool, because then you don't see anything anymore, and then you don't swim straight and then you bump into other people in the next lane. So what did brilliant Claire do?

You know it! She put dishwashing liquid into her goggles, and went swimming. I was 15, like, waaaay too old to say I was too young to know. I leave the rest of that little story to your brilliant imagination.

There you go, reader. A top three. Could not muster 5 things worth being told (I could have put "going to the cinema to see Scary Movie 1 with my father", in there -I do believe I've never been that embarrassed ever since in my whole life-, or "eating that cookie with nuts in it, because it looked delicious", but enough is enough, and I already told you of the time I went to the "speed-friending event" in Austria (hahahaha) and also of the time when I sprayed window-cleaning liquid on my frozen windshield to make the frost melt faster and ended up driving on the pavement and losing a hubcap).

Now the cat is out of the bag (the rat is out of the henhouse ?). If you have additions to make to the list, please, do not hesitate. Might help me feel slightly better.